Remember Crepe Paper??

Yeah - the kind you twisted into hanging streamers every birthday party- the school dance and baby showers?



When blue and pink were used 'cos they didn't KNOW what kind of baby they were having?

Doctor: "Oh look! It's a girl"

Me: "I always wanted a girl!"

Doctor: "Don't you already have one girl??"

Me: "Yes...and 2 boys in-between...like I said..I always wanted A girl."


Yeah that stuff. The crepe paper...please keep up...

Haven't seen the actual crepe paper around - no kids at home to decorate for and if I did it for Mr. B's birthday , I'd be the one to have to clean it up..boy, am I getting lazier or what??

How about Kleenex flowers? Those were great - especially to put on newlywed's cars...along with the crape paper..or wear to Catholic Mass on our heads to simulate a hat...do they even DO that anymore..have to cover their heads?? Wear hats?? oops..I mean, last time I went to Mass....heehee

bygones.

Anyway, last night I spotted crepe paper. Now, one would think that'd be a little joy to see it again...

But there was no joy on Main Street...nope, not even a little...the crepe paper I saw is on MY ARMS!

Yeeeah..the underside of my arms - when did this happen? WHY did this happen? How did the skin seem to shrink when I haven't lost that much weight?

I lotion up all year 'round. I use a good shower soap...

and what the heck IS crepe paper anyway???

Google. If I had stock in that search engine, I could retire my wrinkly arms.. I Googled "crepe paper" and this is what I found...


Noun 1. crepe paper - paper with a crinkled texture; usually colored and used for decorations..

DUH...no flies on you , Google...

..but... what IS crepe paper?

crepe paper - a material made of cellulose pulp derived mainly from wood or rags or certain grasses

Paper that is creped is produced on a paper machine that have a single large steam heated drying cylinder (yankee) fitted with a hot air hood. The raw material is paper pulp. The yankee cylinder is sprayed with adhesives to make the paper stick. Creping is done by the yankee's doctor blade that is scraping the dry paper of the cylinder surface. The crinkle (creping) is controlled by the strength of the adhesive, geometry of the doctor blade, speed difference between the yankee and final section of the paper machine and paper pulp characteristics



nevermind. Geesh.

Seriously, I will now be the "Decorated Version" of my pre-sixty self. Oh yay. Oi vey.

Just one more thing to be excited about...sha boom.

Here's Julie Andrew's tribute to getting older - sung to the tune of "My Favorite Things"

Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting,

Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,

Bundles of magazines tied up in string,

These are a few of my favorite things.


Cadillac's and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,

Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,

Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,

These are a few of my favorite things


When the pipes leak,

When the bones creak,

When the knees go bad,

I simply remember my favorite things,

And then I don't feel so bad.


Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,

No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,

Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,

These are a few of my favorite things.


Back pains, confused brains, and no need for sinnin',

Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',

And we won't mention our short, shrunken frames,

When we remember our favorite things.


When the joints ache,

When the hips break,

When the eyes grow dim,

I will remember the great life I've had,

And then I don't feel so bad.

She received a 4-minute ovation...and, I do believe she wore a long-sleeved dress.

Yeeeah.

-me