Friday, September 5, 2014

Hi there.....

Guess what?? 

Go ahead and take a guess....I'll wait...


I'm retired!  Yep..I did it !  And I am a happy camper for sure..and speaking about campers..

Guess what??

Come on..guess again...

Gracie's finished!

Well, almost.  But enough to take her out to the woods with Braxton & Lulu !

See?












 
Hope you enjoyed the "tour"...

"Say goodnight Gracie..."
-me {and George Burns !}


Friday, April 4, 2014

Just a sittin' & a singin'...

..you know that song...."something something something and warm woolen mittens,,yadda yadda yadda and whiskers on kittens"??




Cute song..maybe with knowing all the words..and cute visuals..warm woolen mittens.." ..wrapped around a cuppa good hot chocolate, right?  Mmm..



and "whiskers on kittens.."  bright eyes and pink noses and all too cute with extremely long whiskers..  cute little mice with whiskers...bunnies..adorable.. <3 p="">


Well, lemme tell you..whiskers may be too too cute on kittens..but not so much on my chinny-chin-chuin...

And the "no-see-ums"? The ones you KNOW are 3 inches long..and stiff and ugly. But when you look in the 10X's magnifying mirror (who invented these anyway? Cruel..just cruel) you cannot see ANYthing? You put the mirror down..feel your chin and THERE. IT. IS. AGAIN!

Dammit.

When and if you  are lucky enough to blindly grab on to it with the mostly useless tweezers..the thing is like7 inches long and..black!

What the..??

Why didn't I see it? Why is the hair in my eyebrows getting thinner and and migrating to my chin?  When is this atrocity happening? When I sleep?

Oh bother...maybe I'll just call myself a kitten and be done with it...

-me

ps...I may need to shave my legs what with summer coming...



Thursday, March 20, 2014

They say "timing is everything..."

OK. so you all probably know I work as a "Paternity DNA Consultant" which sounds all smart & professional, right?  Well..truth be known, it's a call center with 18 other "Paternity DNA Consultants" with varying ages, genders and customer service experience. All informing, in true "Maury" style..."you are NOT the father".

Getting paid for telling women what they already know..

But one thing we all have in common is the need to...um...pee.  And being in a call center, "stats" are very important. So important they can cause you loose your job or be promoted..if one would want to be promoted to "Chief Caller-Person"..

anyway..I digress..

We are allowed 5 minutes of "personal" time per day to do ..well..anything one can do in 5 minutes..like, let's say..pee.

Now, that 5 minutes is on top of the 30 minute unpaid lunch and the 2 - 15-minute paid breaks.

However, I have never been know to "go on command" if you know what I mean.  Random drug tests take me well over a hour to finally give them enough to "randomly"  test me..sometimes even more..



So to tell my pea-sized bladder { note the play on words here? }  that I can go at 10am then at 12pm then at 2:45pm is about as useless as the letter "L" in the word "yeah" ...

Now, I can understand rules are made because some bimbo before me used her  "Personal time "  to run /drive to the the 7-11 for a taco... or 6..

..but I am an old-"er" woman who actually takes medication to rid myself of liquids..and have explained this to the young-perky-supervisor..aka "Chief Caller-Person" ..

So, to benefit the others here who do not have "medical" reason for peeing..I timed myself - walking  at a brisk pace through the LONG hall..into the unoccupied stall.. (if I'm lucky to find one) ...do my whatever..quickly..then wash hands to the tune of "Happy Birthday" as recommended by the US Dept of Health..walk briskly back to my seat..plug in and take my next call..




.. 3:38...for 1 trip..

so.... if the need is for 2 trips..I'm already in the negative..3.38 + 3.38 =  6.76

...remembering the limit is 5.0 per day...see where this is going? {yet another clever pun..}

Also, remembering I have a dislike of  all things mathematical..think of things like weight..age..credit score..mortgage payments...alarm clocks..all have to do with math..

I find this all too much.  Do I need to depend on Depends ? {there I go again!  Ah.. I crack me up..} do I take the chance of being accused of excessive-personal-time-infringements?

Can you  imagine if I got fired for that?


Unemployment person: "So, why were you fired?"

Me: " Excessive Urination?" .."Not running a 4-min mile to the restroom?"... "I'm bladdely impaired?"

Ahh..only 142 work days until retirement...

I DO NOT think I can hold it that long....










Monday, March 10, 2014

Good news for when you're feeling..old.

So, lately I have been looking & feeling old-er than I  have in a while.  Well, actually, I have never been this old before..so..um..

Well anyway. There are times when I look in the mirror and think I don't really look my age and am really surprised when I tell people I'm going to be a great-grandmother

I expect an audible gasp..rarely do I get one anymore.

Yet, when I think of people and how they looked when I was young-er ..I think about 65 year old women looking like, well Aunt Bea from Mayberry..



Or Aunt Jemima from... pancakes..



{actually, she does look pretty good}
Well..certainly not like these...

 {Me 64, Gerri, 70, Kathy, 71, Ella 8 }



{Kathy 71, Me 64, Emily 13, and April (who's going to be a GRANDmother in July, 45}



 Thing is...Aunt Bea was 61 when she lived in Mayberry.   SIXTY-ONE!

I have no idea how old Aunt Jemima was....

So..look in that mirror and smile..head's up, and know we are getting better and better....as well as older and older.

And even at that..remember...that is a privilege denied to many.

XOXO

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Well...here we are. And only 247 days until Monday October 06 2014... a Monday.. 8 months and 5 days from today...

..or 174 WORK days until....I retire.  At 65.

 Not 66 like "they" say I should.

I am sooo looking forward to that.  I work with younger women....uh..girls. Like,  my granddaughter's age..



One said "Oh lucky you!"

Well..I have worked since I was 15.  Even after the babies came..I worked nights and was with them in the daytime.

"Lucky"?  Nah..I worked for this..no luck involved.  Talk to me when you're as old as I am about luck.

Guess you could say that I was "lucky" to have found employment.  And I have had good (and bad) jobs for a person who only went through high school.  No time or money for college if you had a baby on your hip..

At least not for me.

That baby? She went to college AFTER her kids were all  born, half grown and her oldest was in college.

She has an MBA and I couldn't be more proud.

So I think down deep, I really didn't want to go to college - otherwise I would have. Right??

Anyway...back to retirement.  The girls at work asked "what will you do?"

Not work.  Outside the home.


I really want to be a housewife when I grow up.  Really.

 I want to cook dinner every night. Do laundry a little at a time {versus all of it on Saturday}  Iron his shirts.

I know..crazy, right? Not for me.

I've had the jobs where I flew to almost every state, worked 65-80 hours a week..uprooted my kids from schools because " Mrs. Fields wants hubby and I in St. Louis because it's a troubled market"...


Then I got sick. Really really sick. And for the first time, I had time off!  A whole year! Course, it was to visit "cancer land" ..but I got a small taste of not having a boss.  Cooking.  Cleaning.  Crafting.  OK..chemo...  bummer..

But it was good.  I was fully engaged with my husband when he got home..was able to surprise him on his birthday with a Hostess cupcake and a candle delivered by me to his work site..



And I got better..I was blessed..not lucky..for that.

And I am grateful.

And back to work I went and have been there ever since.

I'm ready to retire.  To paint. To read.

To bake  him cupcakes on his birthday..

So, girls..I'll miss you.

But I'll not miss leaving our little home each day.  Or our little dogs.

And who knows..I may bring you a Hostess cupcake on your birthdays as well..




-me

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Weird Thought Wednesday..

OK., so as I get older - I seem to notice little things..

Like:  I cover up more.  Not out of some false modesty..but because I don't like seeing some parts of me.  As I age. Get old-er...

Mind you, I am  not complaining about aging so much as the things I need to do to protect myself from my eyes seeing what they see in the mirror....




Like: shoes..closed toed shows even in summer because I don't like the look of my toes. Socks in winter..and summer.

Like: long or at least 3/4 length sleeves.. for my waving-and-giggling upper arms..

Speaking of arms..what the heck is this looking like crepe-paper skin on my arms? Thus..3/4 or long sleeves...

LIKE:"mock" turtle neck shirt I have on.  Hides the "not-so-mock" turkey-waddle neck I do have..but it also makes me appear to NOT have a neck at all..

Like: long pants in the summer...ugly "veryclose" vein removal scars and knee surgery scar..

Like: glasses..both indoor and out..covering my light-sensitive-far farsightedness-light colored eyes...

"Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes don't see as well and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. "But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand" The Velveteen Rabbit....

So, the only thing that is left left are my original and still shapely ear-lobes..my hair which I noticed by looking back at photos has not changed (except in which hair color I am using ) since the 70's...

At this rate..everything I wear is closing in on any of the remaining "me" ..and should I be passing you on the street..

..you'll recognize me..I'm the one with skinny earlobes and blue-bi-speckled eyes..and  rockin' a totally '70's do ..





Friday, January 17, 2014

Rum-Dum Friday..

Have you ever had just one of "those" days? Where you're awake (sort of) and lucid (sort of) but not totally aware of your surroundings? Yeah..those days. I call the them Rum-Dum days..and, yes, I know how to spell dumb..but that's the whole point..it's dum-days..



So anyway, dreamed last night about re-arranging the furniture in our new little apartment downstairs so it was not actually like living in my mother-in-law's apartment ..making it more our own. It looked great..in my dream..

So, I got about about 5:30 and re-arranged the furniture..(it does look better)sat for a few and had my cuppa.. did a load of clothes, made the bed,took the trash to the curb, got ready for work and packed my lunch. So far, so good, right? I'm awake and preforming tasks..

Drove with very little Friday traffic and was completely aware of my surroundings ..and realized I had driven past my turn-off and was half-way downtown.  Oops.




Parked in my usual spot.  Turned of car. Grabbed my purse and started looking frantically for my keys with the key-fob to get in the building....the same key ring that my car keys are on..that I drove to work with..that I had in my hand..are you seeing the picture?  Thought " Oh crap..I can't get into the building..what am I going to do? Wonder how long it will be before someone comes and I can go in with them?"..all the while holding them in my hand..yeah..

Can you see why I am leery of what the rest of the day holds for me? 

We'll see.  Hopefully I can stay awake until I get home tonight...if I don't pass it and end up in Las Vegas...

-me


Thursday, January 16, 2014

Hello Blog....

..I have missed you.  I have been ..well...distracted. FaceBook..Pinterest..work..you know..the normal stuff that gets in the way of, well..sitting down and putting my thoughts down here.



Sometimes, we know what we need to do..and we know what's going to make us feel better..like knowing if you take a long hot shower when you're felling sick, you'll feel sooo much better but you just can't bring yourself to actually get up and do it? Yeah..it's been like that. 



So, good things..not so good things..changes..all have happened since we were together the last time.

Great-Grandbaby due in July..yay  




Ella Ireland reaching her "double-digit" birthday..can't believe she's 10..




Mother-in-law had a hospital stay resulting in our needing to move into the downstairs apartment and having her move upstairs into our portion of the home..not too bad..getting to like the "pros" of the move and forget the "cons" - peace of mind is everything as far as the worry about her and the steep-older-home-stairs-to-the-basement-apartment-thingy...



Spotted the most magnificent moon this morning - full and round and glowing against the mountain backdrop just before sunrise..wowzer..which, by the way..is much awesome-er than "wow".. 

Braxton loosing the use of his hind legs due to age..poor thing. We have learned to carry up & down stairs, make sure he has rugs to steady himself on..but other than that..he is very young at heart..and happy, too, I think..




Lulu on steroids due to back-disc issues ..so far so good. No pain that we know about..fingers crossed.



Oh..and Gracie has her new metal sides, windows, floors and is awaiting the installation of her cabinets! She's going to be a real beauty!


{artist rendition..lol}

So, hello old friend and friends who take time from their busy days to read my silly thoughts..you all have been missed. XOXO

- me





Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Twesday Toy-let Tawk..

I've got to post in between my thoughts while in the Lady's room..

Anyway, another day..another stall..another thought.

We have a new toilet in the 3rd stall by the wall..and it really flushes! Like..SWOOOOSH..

 
{not our actual stalls}

Which as is really good thing 'cos for a while we had to do the whole "hold-the-handle-down-jiggle-the-flusher" thingy..

{not the actual 3rd stall seat..}

And some people get anxious waiting..waiting..so the leave...

..and when one "drops the kids off at the pool" so-to-speak..one should really stay long enough to say good-bye..or at least to see that they've gone...gone..g.o.n.e. Geesh..

 

{not our actual employees}
 

Anyway..I'm off track.  So I'm enjoying the new potty, not only for it's tremendous swooshing-power, but because it's a little higher ..and I can swing my feet.  Doesn't take much I guess, huh?


{not me..but totally cute, right??}

So, while sitting and swinging..I look up at the only window in the room, in stall 3.. at the end of the wall..

And I think..."If  I need to escape, I can probably fit through the window..maybe.  It is a little high..and looks to be.. thick..

"So what do they use to break the window to escape the murderer" I asks me-self..

Looking around all I see is the toilet brush..to thin..then the icky-plunger-thingy..not strong enough.

Hmmmm..I think I may have to use the tank top..not like a tank top  from the 80's, silly.  The top of the  tank thingy..strong..cold..ceramic???

OK..I may have to think this one out a bit further.

In the meantime, I must work on being "bathroom-window-escape" size..

Wish me luck.

XXOO
me



PS..this has nothing to do with this blog, but I  kinda like it..wonder .."is it available on Kindle??"