Monday, June 29, 2009

Excuses for not having anything to blog about..

1.




Hmph. I got nuthin'...

Seriously..not a thing..

I think I'm depressed about Farrah and Michael and Billy and Ed..


It's a lot of people either close to my age or just a little older..dang.

I really don't want to live forever, and they probably didn't either..but still...it makes one think...


I really want NOT to waste any precious time..but I need to work. Would love to see everything I can see..but I need to work to make the money to do that.

It's that "inner fight"..

I really am pretty satisfied to be an armchair traveler, but then I feel badly about "watching" instead of "living"..

And I'm in a constant state of tired, but I fight sleep 'cos I don't want to miss anything.

I want to eat..to taste everything and enjoy food and make my mouth happy..but I am feeling and looking better by not eating as much as I normally would like to.


I want to go and to and play and be silly and be with family and be alone and be meditative and relax and not think but not waste anytime of what my thinking-cap could do..

I want to be 5 and 16 and 30 and 65..and 83..

I want wisdom and grace..and to act like a child and swing on a swing..

I want to craft and make art and spend every minute with my love and not be in another room..or disconnected from what he's saying or doing..but I want to loose myself in my art...

I want to walk barefoot and dance in high heels..and squish warm mud between my toes..and have ballet slippers.in pink..with ribbons..


I'm a mess.

WaaWaa - what a baby.

I know..I REALLY know how blessed I am..so it's just once in a while this little inner-child brat comes out.



How about you? You in a slump?

-me

18 comments:

Connie said...

We are getting our driveways sealed lately. Mine was supposed to be done two weeks ago, but we have had quite a bit of rain.
I will un- slump when I can put my car in the garage and leave it there. 48 hours to dry, so hopefully it can be finished this week. Time to celebrate...........
Have a good upcoming week.

diane said...

A great post about nuthin'. A lot of what you think and say is relevant to me too. We have a lot in common.I'm lucky I have finished my 10 week contract at work and can rest until I get offered another one. The flower you didn't know on my blog is a Banksia. I think it is called the Orange Bansia or Banksia Prionotes.Unfortunately I'm not very good at learning botanical names, which I'm ashamed of because I love flowers, plants and gardening.
I too am in a slump. It is six weeks since my operation and I still have pain. Its not excrutiating but uncomfortable. I've been back to the specialist who said its not normal and I have to go for more Xrays. Before the op I felt fit and happy but not now.Then I see other people who are much worse off than me, like your brother, and think I should be thankful and not miserable.

debi @ life in my studio said...

hahaha!! You make me laugh! What a great post....I know exactly what you mean.
Btw, I LOVE your new blog banner!!

Neabear said...

You took the words right out of my mouth. I have those feelings a lot these days. I want to be able to visit my kids, but need to work to afford that, but not quite enough money yet to go, plus I seem to not get much vacation time. I want to be retired, but can't afford to do that either. Waaaa!! My granddaughter is growing up without me there and sometimes that really bothers me. At times I don't even feel like a grandma, because she is not around to call me grandma. It does make me feel better to realize I am not the only one with all those funky feelings.

Lori R. said...

Isn't it nice to know others feel the same way at times. My roller coaster ride of everyday living hits that spot many times. I just know the next day will be back on the way up to the top of the hill. I have found blogging definately gives me the outlet I need so many times! Have a wonderful day and if today isn't wonderful, maybe tomorrow will be :)
Ps. LOVE your little one allowing you to contort her/his face*

Artistic Accents by Darla said...

Great post and many, including me, feel the same!
I've got plans to tandem parachute next month with my sons and now I'm having serious second thoughts. So much death lately and do I really need to tempt fate? I'm thinking no at this point. ha

Have a great day!
Darla

Betty said...

Another fun post, as usual. Your thoughts meander through such fun fields. I was in a slump once (maybe twice, but that's about it); usually I have two kinds of days...happy and ecstatic.

Hope you're smiling bigtime by now! Love ya.

Charmingdesigns said...

I wasn't in a slump until I read your post...LOL. Just kidding!
You said it so well, but then I see or read about others in bad shape and I thank my lucky stars things are OK right now! Have a wonderful day dear friend, you're great! Laurie

The Feathered Nest said...

Wonderful post Colleen!!! And so true....I think that the celebrities deaths have affected my little Noah too ~ He's been having trouble sleeping this week for having worrying thoughts. We're all "about that age" and he's just realizing it. You say it so well in this post...we all are such a mixed bag!!!
hugs and love, Dawn

Laurie said...

Oh Colleen you hit the nail on the head with this humorous, yet serious look on life. I feel so much the same way, and am held back so often out of fear, anxiety, and would love to just jump in and enjoy every minute life has to offer. You really made me not only laugh today, but anxious to get out and do, a lot to think about! Thanks!

Pearl said...

Collen I really enjoyed this post it echoed what I'm going through right now. I really relate to this post a lot and I'm in a funk right now. I'm writing a post about my sister who died tragically of a heroin addiction and its brought back so many memories that I thought I had put away. It's depressing so it's going to take me a long time before I post it. In the mean time I'm just posting pictures of feelings. I always relate to your blog. Love ya Pearl

June said...

Oh, Colleen! For someone with nothing to say, you said so much of depth and importance. Your slump is shared here. We're blaming it on the weather (NO SUN). But this evening, in the mist, we picked strawberries. We are eating the berries and making the jam and believing in summer -- even if we did wear our winter boots to pick the berries. Hugs across America...

Vee said...

Quite possibly I am for that basement cartoon of Mildred and what's her name could have been used in my last post. It would've been perfect! Thanks, Colleen. You keep us laughing AND thinking.

Connie said...

This is a great post ! The up's and down's of life. I think you have quite a bit of company.
I just saw my comment above, and wonder who I meant it for ? It doesn't seem to be applicable to your post.
Keep your humor flowing ~~ we enjoy it and your wisdom.

Pen Pen said...

Sometimes we need a little dose of reality to make us get our priorities straight, right? Let's figure out how to quit work and travel the world!

Pearl said...

Boy do I want to come play with you!! Be kids and be silly, yay!

Julie said...

I know about Farrah and Michael and Ed~ and Karl Malden, but who is Ed?

Don't feel alone - I feel so many of the same things you do. Inside, I am perpetually 27, with some regressions back but none forward!!!

Julie said...

I know about Farrah and Michael and Ed~ and Karl Malden, but who is Ed?

Don't feel alone - I feel so many of the same things you do. Inside, I am perpetually 27, with some regressions back but none forward!!!