Monday, August 30, 2010

Campers: Nature's way of feeding the mosquitos. - Unknown..or was that me??

Guess what we're doing this week-end??

Go on...

Yes..you're right..camping!

"I got into an argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent. That's a bad place for an argument, because then I tried to walk out and slammed the flap. How are you supposed to express your anger in this situation? Zipper it up really quick?"
~Mitch Hedberg

We haven't been camping-camping in a l.o.n.g. time...


Yeah..like in a tent..with camping food..low-fat, low-calorie, healthy food...
Guess we won't have to worry about the bears getting into my food...they get to eat whatever they want AND sleep all winter..what's up with that??


The whole bunch of us are going..Jeff & Rachael, April & Chris & Emily..

April sometimes has hard times actually getting away from her job..
But we always manage to have a wonderful time...


Plus, this year we have our GPS...that'll help, right?
OK, picture this...

Hot hot Texas camping 20-some years ago...

No "facilities" 

Mr. B was thoughtful enough to bring a sweat-box-torture device porta-potty for us..it wasn't nearly this high-tech..looking more like a TV tray holding a bag and a small tent with a tall pole in the center to hold it up..

Placed it over and away from the campsite..where no one can hear you scream..

I go in, zip-shut, notice a breeze coming up the ridge..notice it's like 152 degrees in the potty-tent..
and cautiously take my seat..

About then I notice the bag that holds the..uh..um..stuff..is slipping off the ring-thingy holding it on.

With one hand I grab the edge of the bag..and continue what I was doing.

The wind picks up to a howling speed and knocks the center pole of the potty-tent down.

So now I'm holding the bag with one hand, pants around my ankles..potty-tent is being blown into my face as my head is now the only thing holding up the tent at all..

Sweating, holding, pooping, the tent now reveals to the world the silhouette of me.....my un-busy hand straight up as it is now the tent pole..

Ah..gotta love the great outdoors...

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, and  sh** poop in the woods.. something is wrong. ~George Carlin


Have a great Labor Day holiday and I'll be back on Tuesday..with pictures..and probably a story or two..

-me

14 comments:

Lucy said...

I love camping. BUT. . . I gotta be near a CLEAN bathroom. A shower would be a plus but I favor a clean loo over that for a few days. Well .. maybe one. Then I gotta have that shower. And clean clothes. I have no idea how Lewis and Clark did it.

Pearl said...

And this is why I don't camp :)

Artistic Accents by Darla said...

What a riot! Your porta-tent-potty experience sounds so much like something that would happen to me!
Too funny!
Have a great time camping Colleen!

Vee said...

Well have great fun! I'm such a stick in the mud that I turned down my one invitation to Labor Day camping. Watch out for that GPS! Not laughing yet, but my Aunt Ess just called and she couldn't stop laughing.

Charmingdesigns said...

Oh you brought back memories. My husband broke our little portapotty in our travel trailer. Kersplat...not a good thing...but boy did I laugh

Ming said...

LOL @ Colleen's latreen lamentation! Love it!
Have a great trip this time! Looking forward to pix from the trip.

MK said...

What George Carlin said.

Debby said...

Have a wonderful time. I haven't been in years and I don't have the desire to do that again. Those are great funnies you put up. Thank you for the laughs.

Zuzu said...

Hope you all have a great time!!!
Hugs,
Zuzu

Sue said...

Hi Colleen!

Just returned from Vancouver and over a week without internet...trying to catchup on missed posts.

Loved this camping post. Over 30 years ago, hubby and I (boyfriend then) used to go camping with friends. Once we were married, I put my foot down and demanded the comfort of a cottage. Your post illustrates perfectly why! LOL

Hugs,

Sue

Karen said...

I hope it's all you imagine it's going to be!

Life is good! said...

hope you are having a grand ole time. and staying warm at night and cool during the day. my idea of camping is at the Marriott!

Ellen said...

How close will you be to a Holiday Inn, Marriott, anything with walls and indoor plumbing? ;)

Have a great trip, can't wait to read all about it!

xoxo,
Ellen

wendy said...

Hope you have a great camping trip! Can't wait to hear your stories and see some pictures! Wendy