My truly, seriously, terriffic, totally-almost-free $.69 Christmas...

This year, Mr. B and me (I know that's not "proper" English, but it sounds cuter than "Mr. B and I" ..work with me here...) decided, as we do most years, to not give each other Christmas gifts, because, well, Santa always brings something for each of us and with all that we have, it's more fun to be the give-r instead of the give-ee.

We usually "cheat" on this plan, just a teensy-weensy bit, buying some little trinket. Like this year, Mr. B didn't technically buy me a gift, but rather saved some cash so I can have a good time in New Jersey visiting Ella for her 5th. birthday..

And I got...well.....inventive...

Received a $50-off coupon for any purchase $50 or more from the furniture store we bought our living room stuff from..

I thought maybe, just maybe, I could find something for $50 for him...so I took the coupon, along with one for $10 off of a purchase of $10 or more from Penney's, and went to the stores on Christmas eve.

Now remember, credit cards, debit cards and check are my mortal enemies, so I fully depend on cash..my "self-imposed" allowance..

So going to the store, I figured I'd need money for the tax on a $50 "free" item...and the tax for the $10 item...

Hmmm..what do I have in my wallet...

Shut-Up! No bills?? Change... Just loose change??

Yeppers..a whopping $3.54 in ...change...

First stop - so far, nothing in the furniture store for $50 - and remember, I can't go over...

I spot a throw for $39.67 (why do they price things like that anyway?)....

...take it up to the counter - they say "No, it HAS to be $50 or... more..."

(Que the "fishing-for-bigger-sales" ploy here...)

I can't (or don't want to) explain I HAVE no cash for "over"...

They say I can get something else to add up to the $50...

GEESH! Now I have to do ...math!?

So here I am walking around with "stuff" (OK, this candle is $11.46....add to that, this frame for ...uh...$11.27..that makes...is it hot in here??...uh...)

Panic is starting to set in...eager sales people are asking me if I've found everything...I am adding up in my head as fast as I can..let's see..so far I have..uh...$39.67 for the throw..plus $11.46..that's ..uh..and then $11.27...

That's when I spotted "IT"...a cute canvas..slowly approaching it I see the price...$50. 65 ! What?! Can this be true?!

As I run through the store practically throwing the little oddly-priced items back where they came from..I'm thinking in my head..."OK, slow down...tax rate is something like 6.8%..Oh geesh..where's a calculator when I need one?? (I was told later by my lovely daughter, "Mom, you DO know you have a calculator in your phone, right??"...uh..really?? Oh yeah, I knew that..uh huh..)



So I purchased this cute canvas, and get this, they only charged me the tax on the $.65!


It looks like a metal sign, but it's on a canvas...and probably not really worth $50.65 ..really..

But I knew the colors were good, that Mr. B would have something to open and we could both enjoy this...

Which brings me to Penney's...ever try to find something at Penney's for a man, for $10?? Not easy.

Do you know underwear is like $14.00??

So I looked and looked and finally found 2 pair of good 'ol socks - normally $20 (for 2 pair? Can you imagine??) that was marked down to $9.99..

Oh crap...will it HAVE to be the "$10 or more" routine again??

Nope. They rang it up and said, "Well, this one's a freebee!"

I practically ran out of the store..thinking they had made a mistake and someone would be chasing me down for my expensive men's socks...

So, gift of canvas image.........$.69

Men's heavy duty socks.....$.00

The look on Mr. B's face.......Priceless!


(here's the receipt for the canvas.. Pity the poor saleswoman who had to claim commission on that one...)

Best part? I still have money left over! Yep, I have...uh...let's see..$3.54 minus $.69.....9 from 14, carry the one,or is it borrow the one...uh..no, that's not right...

Has anyone seen my phone??

Happy bargain-hunting in the New Year!!

-me