I've always been tired. Not your average "I mowed the lawn, feed the cattle, raised the barn " tired..but even as a kid I remember right after breakfast my Mother telling me to go outside and play. Fresh air and all..

And I remember being soooo tired. I just wanted to stay in, go back to bed or at least play with my dolls inside.

So, I'd usually go out, dragging some sort of stuffed animal with me and sometimes I'd climb in the big tree in the backyard and just watch..the cars going by, the neighbors watering their lawns and sometimes I'd watch my Mother call for me and I'd just watch her looking around the yard wondering where I'd gone off to this time.  

But now I can pull back that memory and I feel the tiredness in my bones...and, as I've gotten older, the guilt for making my Mother worry while I hid from her, giggling, feeling like someone in one of my chapter books by being so clever.

I'm a couple of weeks short of my 72nd birthday now, and I was tired in my teens, tired when I became a Mom, tired when I joined the workforce, tired when I left the workforce, and I'm tired now. 

So no, it's not the pandemic, not the state of the world, not my "active" lifestyle, not my advancing age... I'm just so bloody tired...anyone else ?