Sounds & Love

We have a "deal" Randy & I. He loves to cook, I don't. I love to have a clean, pretty kitchen. He just needs it to be useful. Workable. Organized. And, in his words "functional". So we decided when we retired, to take on these roles. He cooks, I clean. And, so far, it's working great.

So, what does that have to do with sounds, and why is it about love ?  Well, hearing someone working in the kitchen, cleaning after a good meal, reminds me of when I was a little girl and hearing either my mother or my sisters rinsing dishes with the water running, hearing the dishes clang together being put in the drying rack and usually, hearing my sisters talking and laughing. It was soothing to me. I was too young to know why at the time, and I don't think I ever even thought about it, however, now I know that was security. That was home. That was my safe place. I do wonder now why my brother was not invited to this "hen party, but that's another post for another time.

So today when Randy made a yummy Chinese Chicken Salad, a great recipe from Kathy, I was ready to do the kitchen "in a bit" because I was having a lot of pain that I had mentioned to him when he asked how I was feeling earlier in the day, when I heard the familiar sound of rinsing dishes and the clanging of plates.  I even thought I was smelling the  bubbly dish soap.

Don't know why I didn't check right then, guess I was caught up in the memory. A while later Blueberry needed to go out and as I entered the kitchen, I see Randy has cleaned the counters, filled the dishwasher and the dishwasher was happily doing what I would normally do. Not a word from him, not asking if I had noticed.  It was so thoughtful and kind, I just smiled and told him "thank you".

That's where the love comes in. After 46 years, he still tries to make my day better. And he did. What wonderful memories he brought up for me !

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Wanna see what I've been up to ??

 I always wanted a dollhouse. My dad was a carpenter and was asked by one of his wealthy customers to make a dollhouse for their daughter. I was soo jealous. But I also understood it was his job...it was for work, for pay so we could eat, pay bills and have a simple but happy life. 

But now that I am older than my dad ever was, which makes me so sad for him, I have decided I'm not too old to start my own dollhouse.

 No matter what I do with it, it'll never be as beautiful as what his hands produced, but it'll be mine...and his. This one's for you Daddy❤...and it's just the beginning 🤓

Dreams or Nightmares ?

 Sometimes it's hard to determine which they are. I know when I have a happy dream..and if I'm awaken, I want to go back to sleep to continue.  Butcha can't do that...dammit...

Some start sort of good-ish but can turn ugly pretty quickly.  Those are the ones that stay with you ALL DAY LONG,  nagging and making you question why on earth you'd have those thoughts...or why those people didn't include you or left you or why are they being just mean..

I've had some of both lately. That's one reason I restarted my blog. For me. Trying to figure out what's up in my head ..And maybe to connect with some old bloggers.. Not that they are old. I don't know, maybe there are some old bloggers out there.... I'm getting old. And I'm glad. 

Anyway, even if not one person in the whole world ever sees this, I will have.  And maybe, just maybe I will learn something about.....me 🤓

Happy St. Patrick's Day 2023 !

 

Corned beef and cabbage, homemade hardy bread with Kerry Gold butter from Ireland... looking through photos from our trip to Ireland in 2015...a surprise of a lifetime for me, and actually the same lovely guy provided both..the trip and tonight's delicious dinner.  My Randy, my husband, my friend. Oh geeze getting all soapy on this Friday night, huh ? 

It was a lovely trip in 2015... Meeting  blogger friends in "real time".. finding the friendliness of the Irish is alive and well even in these harsh times....seeing such beauty and actually walking in my ancestor's footsteps, finding my great grandfather's grave...

Today was rather ordinary. Cooking, cleaning, sitting under the new patio watching the dogs and enjoying the cold, but not snowy day. 

Of course, I miss my Sullivan family. First St. Patrick's day without them. However, I have so many wonderful memories and Emily, Larry's daughter, started sending me cards..seems she had a tradition of sending St. Patrick's day cards to her Dad and now she sends them to me. We all miss Larry...he was the best ! 

Tomorrow we go to Tooele for lunch with Jeff and Christie. Dogs will be on their own. Hope Owen feels better in his tummy ! 

Good night 🌙 from Main Street, USA 🤓

Hello...is it me you're looking for ..???

 If it is..here I am ! I am looking for all of you...I need you all back, sharing your life and days with me. I do get lonely and crave the company of friends I have found throughout the years. And oh, what those years have been. And, although I am not alone, ( Mr. B is retired too )  I am lonely for the warmth of your stories, getting a peek into the day to day news for your cottages, your gardens, your farms and your city scapes, your photos and just the everyday conversations with you girls...

So, if you're here..let me know 🤓

Just another manic Monday...

 

Well, not as bad as that grandmother is having...but...

Now that we're retired, we have a tendency to stay up late at night, making "first thing in morning" a wee bit later 

So when you have an early ( for me) Dr appointment at 7:30am, you need to set an alarm, take an early shower, dress and try to be presentable, at did I mention commute time ?

I was nervous about being late so I left at 7am ( we're only like 10 minutes away ) Found the correct building in the maze of a newly remodeled hospital/Dr offices. 

New Dr that I have never seen, and of course I forgot her name when the receptionist asks "What's your Dr's name ?"  The receptionist is having trouble finding my appointment. 

She asked the usual questions... name, DOB ...still nothing. She finally looks up and says " it's for the 27th..." I interrupted her and said " it IS the 27th"  to which she finishes her sentence and says " 27th of OCTOBER... " 

" OH...hi ! I'm early ! "  

As I turn to leave she says "see you soon...like in a month.." 

OK...yeah, see you in October...

So, yeah...

 Wow...what a year & a half, am I right ? Seems like everyone wants  to get back to " normal "... but I want it better than what it was. I bet most of you do too. So, I think it's up to us, all of us, and it needs to  start in the home first.

I am not forgetting the thousands of souls lost, the  thousands of families suffering their losses. My heart hurts for them.

But I'm thinking about what I can do on a smaller scale. Be more aware of what's around me, in the neighborhood, with the neighbors, with the children passing our front window, walking home from school.

We were quite well looked after by my son and DIL, neighbors that saw us over the fence and even someone we don't know other than waving at her as she walked her dogs past that same front window each day and came to the door and asked if we were ok... ( I think we're now that " older couple down the street... lol ) 

But Randy and I can do more than we have. Believe it or not, there are even OLDER couples in the 'hood. We need to be their helpers too. 

So maybe we can't do a lot of physical activity, but we can ask a neighbor, young or old, if they need something from the store while we're there. Maybe make some cookies to share with the a neighbor while I'm making some for us. I don't know, donate more of the things I'm decluttering...give a young artist a bunch of painting supplies I no longer use...whatever. 

I want to help. May not have extra money to share and these old bones can't fix your plumbing or pull your weeds, but I do see you and I do care. Let's make normal a show of help and consideration. Let's show the children walking by my window that we're here for them if they need help. Let's make normal better. 

Have a good night 🌙

 I've always been tired. Not your average "I mowed the lawn, feed the cattle, raised the barn " tired..but even as a kid I remember right after breakfast my Mother telling me to go outside and play. Fresh air and all..

And I remember being soooo tired. I just wanted to stay in, go back to bed or at least play with my dolls inside.

So, I'd usually go out, dragging some sort of stuffed animal with me and sometimes I'd climb in the big tree in the backyard and just watch..the cars going by, the neighbors watering their lawns and sometimes I'd watch my Mother call for me and I'd just watch her looking around the yard wondering where I'd gone off to this time.  

But now I can pull back that memory and I feel the tiredness in my bones...and, as I've gotten older, the guilt for making my Mother worry while I hid from her, giggling, feeling like someone in one of my chapter books by being so clever.

I'm a couple of weeks short of my 72nd birthday now, and I was tired in my teens, tired when I became a Mom, tired when I joined the workforce, tired when I left the workforce, and I'm tired now. 

So no, it's not the pandemic, not the state of the world, not my "active" lifestyle, not my advancing age... I'm just so bloody tired...anyone else ? 

So...how do you know when oranges are good?  I think it's Sooo disappointing when you get a big ol' navel orange thinking it's going to be really sweet aaaand..nope

If I was in marketing, I would have sampling of the oranges. If I was sure I'd get a sweet one, I'd buy a bag full. But if I don't know...I'm probably not going to buy one, take it home and if it's good, go back...no. I won't. And you? What do you do??  Have I I mentioned that I loooove sweet oranges?

So much to say..so much has happened..from very good to very bad...

2015 was a pretty rough year and I couldn't be happier to say good bye it on January 1st...

We lost our beautiful daughter-in-law, Rachael,in November. Depression + pain pills + alcohol = death at a young age. She and our son Jeff had been married a little over 8 years. They found they couldn't have children which only added to her PTSD from a sexual assault a few years prior to her meeting Jeff. She had demons none of us could help her with.  I ever in the world imagined having to comfort my son in loosing his wife. We weren't entirely sure he'd made it to the other side. But, with love and support, and sheer strength we didn't know he possessed, he has and has found his "new normal"

We lost Braxton, our sweet old man of 15, after many arduous months of him loosing the use of his back legs and us trying acupuncture, doggie wheel chairs, a stroller and pain meds to no avail. We knew we had to let him go..and we miss him each and every day..Lulu is still calling all the shots around here and because she is not "other dog friendly", we have decided to let her live out the rest of her senior years alone with us all to herself. She is a sweetheart you know...

Our  great grandson, Oliver celebrated his first birthday.. MrB and I fulfilled our dream of going to Ireland,,, it was the trip I never expected but always wished for. And, it was everything we had hoped for with the exception of it being only a week and not a month!

We took a few great camping trips in Gracie, our home made trailer. I've started painting again. Got 2 knees replaced..well that was silly..I only have 2..guess I should have said BOTH knees ...

Fell into the trap of FaceBook, Instagram, Pinerest, YouTube and all sorts of time stealers.

And that in a nutshell is why I've been gone ...but I did miss blogging. So, here I am again. I look forward to catching up with all of you ..

Oh, I'll still enjoy FB, Instagram and YouTube...but I will be here, my first "social media" love
-me

I don't even know if this works anymore, but...

..I wanted to go back, reminisce, look at what was my passion for so long. Blogging. Before FaceBook....before Instagram... chat, messenger..

And I realized I miss blogging. Using more than just a few words to convey my day, my feelings, my life.

So..what have I been up to? Getting older, which is " a privilege denied to many" so that's not really so bad.  What is bad is what I can do in my head but cannot do with my body.

Like Zumba, Walking long distances. Kneeling. Being able to make a fist..or ...

Complain, complain, complain! That's another thing..I complain. Geesh..as they say, getting older is not for sissies..

Well, I'm no sissy, so, bring it on..my sciatica and I are ready for you..

Hi there.....

Guess what?? 

Go ahead and take a guess....I'll wait...


I'm retired!  Yep..I did it !  And I am a happy camper for sure..and speaking about campers..

Guess what??

Come on..guess again...

Gracie's finished!

Well, almost.  But enough to take her out to the woods with Braxton & Lulu !

See?

 

Hope you enjoyed the "tour"...

"Say goodnight Gracie..."

-me {and George Burns !}



Just a sittin' & a singin'...

They say "timing is everything..."

OK. so you all probably know I work as a "Paternity DNA Consultant" which sounds all smart & professional, right?  Well..truth be known, it's a call center with 18 other "Paternity DNA Consultants" with varying ages, genders and customer service experience. All informing, in true "Maury" style..."you are NOT the father".

Getting paid for telling women what they already know..

But one thing we all have in common is the need to...um...pee.  And being in a call center, "stats" are very important. So important they can cause you loose your job or be promoted..if one would want to be promoted to "Chief Caller-Person"..

anyway..I digress..

We are allowed 5 minutes of "personal" time per day to do ..well..anything one can do in 5 minutes..like, let's say..pee.

Now, that 5 minutes is on top of the 30 minute unpaid lunch and the 2 - 15-minute paid breaks.

However, I have never been know to "go on command" if you know what I mean.  Random drug tests take me well over a hour to finally give them enough to "randomly"  test me..sometimes even more..

So to tell my pea-sized bladder { note the play on words here? }  that I can go at 10am then at 12pm then at 2:45pm is about as useless as the letter "L" in the word "yeah" ...

Now, I can understand rules are made because some bimbo before me used her  "Personal time "  to run /drive to the the 7-11 for a taco... or 6..

..but I am an old-"er" woman who actually takes medication to rid myself of liquids..and have explained this to the young-perky-supervisor..aka "Chief Caller-Person" ..

So, to benefit the others here who do not have "medical" reason for peeing..I timed myself - walking  at a brisk pace through the LONG hall..into the unoccupied stall.. (if I'm lucky to find one) ...do my whatever..quickly..then wash hands to the tune of "Happy Birthday" as recommended by the US Dept of Health..walk briskly back to my seat..plug in and take my next call..

.. 3:38...for 1 trip..

so.... if the need is for 2 trips..I'm already in the negative..3.38 + 3.38 =  6.76

...remembering the limit is 5.0 per day...see where this is going? {yet another clever pun..}

Also, remembering I have a dislike of  all things mathematical..think of things like weight..age..credit score..mortgage payments...alarm clocks..all have to do with math..

I find this all too much.  Do I need to depend on Depends ? {there I go again!  Ah.. I crack me up..} do I take the chance of being accused of excessive-personal-time-infringements?

Can you  imagine if I got fired for that?

Unemployment person: "So, why were you fired?"

Me: " Excessive Urination?" .."Not running a 4-min mile to the restroom?"... "I'm bladdely impaired?"

Ahh..only 142 work days until retirement...

I DO NOT think I can hold it that long....

Good news for when you're feeling..old.

So, lately I have been looking & feeling old-er than I  have in a while.  Well, actually, I have never been this old before..so..um..

Well anyway. There are times when I look in the mirror and think I don't really look my age and am really surprised when I tell people I'm going to be a great-grandmother

I expect an audible gasp..rarely do I get one anymore.

Yet, when I think of people and how they looked when I was young-er ..I think about 65 year old women looking like, well Aunt Bea from Mayberry..

Or Aunt Jemima from... pancakes..

{actually, she does look pretty good}

Well..certainly not like these...

 {Me 64, Gerri, 70, Kathy, 71, Ella 8 }

{Kathy 71, Me 64, Emily 13, and April (who's going to be a GRANDmother in July, 45}

 Thing is...Aunt Bea was 61 when she lived in Mayberry.   SIXTY-ONE!

I have no idea how old Aunt Jemima was....

So..look in that mirror and smile..head's up, and know we are getting better and better....as well as older and older.

And even at that..remember...that is a privilege denied to many.

XOXO

Well...here we are. And only 247 days until Monday October 06 2014... a Monday.. 8 months and 5 days from today...

..or 174 WORK days until....I retire.  At 65.

 Not 66 like "they" say I should.

I am sooo looking forward to that.  I work with younger women....uh..girls. Like,  my granddaughter's age..

One said "Oh lucky you!"

Well..I have worked since I was 15.  Even after the babies came..I worked nights and was with them in the daytime.

"Lucky"?  Nah..I worked for this..no luck involved.  Talk to me when you're as old as I am about luck.

Guess you could say that I was "lucky" to have found employment.  And I have had good (and bad) jobs for a person who only went through high school.  No time or money for college if you had a baby on your hip..

At least not for me.

That baby? She went to college AFTER her kids were all  born, half grown and her oldest was in college.

She has an MBA and I couldn't be more proud.

So I think down deep, I really didn't want to go to college - otherwise I would have. Right??

Anyway...back to retirement.  The girls at work asked "what will you do?"

Not work.  Outside the home.

I really want to be a housewife when I grow up.  Really.

 I want to cook dinner every night. Do laundry a little at a time {versus all of it on Saturday}  Iron his shirts.

I know..crazy, right? Not for me.

I've had the jobs where I flew to almost every state, worked 65-80 hours a week..uprooted my kids from schools because " Mrs. Fields wants hubby and I in St. Louis because it's a troubled market"...

Then I got sick. Really really sick. And for the first time, I had time off!  A whole year! Course, it was to visit "cancer land" ..but I got a small taste of not having a boss.  Cooking.  Cleaning.  Crafting.  OK..chemo...  bummer..

But it was good.  I was fully engaged with my husband when he got home..was able to surprise him on his birthday with a Hostess cupcake and a candle delivered by me to his work site..

And I got better..I was blessed..not lucky..for that.

And I am grateful.

And back to work I went and have been there ever since.

I'm ready to retire.  To paint. To read.

To bake  him cupcakes on his birthday..

So, girls..I'll miss you.

But I'll not miss leaving our little home each day.  Or our little dogs.

And who knows..I may bring you a Hostess cupcake on your birthdays as well..

-me

Weird Thought Wednesday..

OK., so as I get older - I seem to notice little things..

Like:  I cover up more.  Not out of some false modesty..but because I don't like seeing some parts of me.  As I age. Get old-er...

Mind you, I am  not complaining about aging so much as the things I need to do to protect myself from my eyes seeing what they see in the mirror....

Like: shoes..closed toed shows even in summer because I don't like the look of my toes. Socks in winter..and summer.

Like: long or at least 3/4 length sleeves.. for my waving-and-giggling upper arms..

Speaking of arms..what the heck is this looking like crepe-paper skin on my arms? Thus..3/4 or long sleeves...

LIKE:"mock" turtle neck shirt I have on.  Hides the "not-so-mock" turkey-waddle neck I do have..but it also makes me appear to NOT have a neck at all..

Like: long pants in the summer...ugly "veryclose" vein removal scars and knee surgery scar..

Like: glasses..both indoor and out..covering my light-sensitive-far farsightedness-light colored eyes...

"Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes don't see as well and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. "But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand" The Velveteen Rabbit....

So, the only thing that is left left are my original and still shapely ear-lobes..my hair which I noticed by looking back at photos has not changed (except in which hair color I am using ) since the 70's...

At this rate..everything I wear is closing in on any of the remaining "me" ..and should I be passing you on the street..

..you'll recognize me..I'm the one with skinny earlobes and blue-bi-speckled eyes..and  rockin' a totally '70's do ..

Rum-Dum Friday..

Have you ever had just one of "those" days? Where you're awake (sort of) and lucid (sort of) but not totally aware of your surroundings? Yeah..those days. I call the them Rum-Dum days..and, yes, I know how to spell dumb..but that's the whole point..it's dum-days..

So anyway, dreamed last night about re-arranging the furniture in our new little apartment downstairs so it was not actually like living in my mother-in-law's apartment ..making it more our own. It looked great..in my dream..

So, I got about about 5:30 and re-arranged the furniture..(it does look better)sat for a few and had my cuppa.. did a load of clothes, made the bed,took the trash to the curb, got ready for work and packed my lunch. So far, so good, right? I'm awake and preforming tasks..

Drove with very little Friday traffic and was completely aware of my surroundings ..and realized I had driven past my turn-off and was half-way downtown.  Oops.

Parked in my usual spot.  Turned of car. Grabbed my purse and started looking frantically for my keys with the key-fob to get in the building....the same key ring that my car keys are on..that I drove to work with..that I had in my hand..are you seeing the picture?  Thought " Oh crap..I can't get into the building..what am I going to do? Wonder how long it will be before someone comes and I can go in with them?"..all the while holding them in my hand..yeah..

Can you see why I am leery of what the rest of the day holds for me? 

We'll see.  Hopefully I can stay awake until I get home tonight...if I don't pass it and end up in Las Vegas...

-me

Hello Blog....

..I have missed you.  I have been ..well...distracted. FaceBook..Pinterest..work..you know..the normal stuff that gets in the way of, well..sitting down and putting my thoughts down here.

Sometimes, we know what we need to do..and we know what's going to make us feel better..like knowing if you take a long hot shower when you're felling sick, you'll feel sooo much better but you just can't bring yourself to actually get up and do it? Yeah..it's been like that. 

So, good things..not so good things..changes..all have happened since we were together the last time.

Great-Grandbaby due in July..yay  

Ella Ireland reaching her "double-digit" birthday..can't believe she's 10..

Mother-in-law had a hospital stay resulting in our needing to move into the downstairs apartment and having her move upstairs into our portion of the home..not too bad..getting to like the "pros" of the move and forget the "cons" - peace of mind is everything as far as the worry about her and the steep-older-home-stairs-to-the-basement-apartment-thingy...

Spotted the most magnificent moon this morning - full and round and glowing against the mountain backdrop just before sunrise..wowzer..which, by the way..is much awesome-er than "wow".. 

Braxton loosing the use of his hind legs due to age..poor thing. We have learned to carry up & down stairs, make sure he has rugs to steady himself on..but other than that..he is very young at heart..and happy, too, I think..

Lulu on steroids due to back-disc issues ..so far so good. No pain that we know about..fingers crossed.

Oh..and Gracie has her new metal sides, windows, floors and is awaiting the installation of her cabinets! She's going to be a real beauty!

{artist rendition..lol}

So, hello old friend and friends who take time from their busy days to read my silly thoughts..you all have been missed. XOXO

- me