Tuesday, February 8, 2011

wanna know what you get with cheap..er..thrifty neclackes??

No. not the green ring around your neck.. but that reminds me.. remember when you were a kid and you bought cheap rings and they turned your finger green so you put clear nail polish on the inside so they wouldn't turn your finger green but you mistakenly got super glue instead of nail polish  and you couldn't get that stupid cheap-ass ring off for a MONTH!!!?!?!?!



Oh, wait.  That was me...

byegones..

So this morning, getting ready for work, I put on my trusty white T-shirt and think it needs a little somethin' somethin'..some color, some bling!

Grab this silver-pearl-seed-bead-jobby I got at an unnamed cheap  frugal accessories shop in the mall..

Looking good!  I bend over to tie my shoes and I hear all these rain drops..then I feel all these rain drops on my neck and chest and it sounds like it's actually raining inside my room?? Wha??



I look up and see (albeit briefly) thousands of tiny seed-beads flying off my necklace..hitting the floor like a bad game of marbles..



I grab for my neck..have you ever tried to contain thousands of seed beads from cheap necklaces flying off the fishing-line they call chain??

It looked like I was sneezing seed-beads..every time I moved any part of me, more seed-beads fell out ..I didn't know which way to go..seed-beads flinging everywhere..in my hair, behind my ears...


Got some down the from of me and they escaped while I was waking the pups..some others fell from my pants legs {?} at work..

I was afraid to cough, or sneeze or fart anything ...for fear of projectile seed-beads attacks ..

Reminds me of when Emily was little  {at our house for Thanks-mas} and making something with glitter.  Every time she got up from her little chair, there was a cloud of glitter and every time she sat back down..the clouds came from under her bum..



I said it looked like she was "fartin' sparkles" and her Dad said "Spartin Farkles??" We named the  turkey Spartin Farkles that year..and I keep threatening to write a children's  book...The Adventures of Spartin Farkles..



Well, have a sparkly-farkly-glitter-filled day, OK?  And don't invest in cheap..well OK, CHEAP necklaces...




-me

10 comments:

diane b said...

Thanks for the giggle. I could see you leaving a trail of seed beads all the way to work like Hansel and Gretel.
I bet they were all over the bathroom floor after you had been in there with you pants down.

Ming said...

OMG Colleen, we ARE twins separated at birth! You and I have the same luck.

Loved your story, I actually LOL when you were afraid to fart!

Only you my dear bloggin' friend, only you would fart beads!

Lucy (aka rharper) said...

OTHER people put clear nail polise around their fingers to keep the green away??? Wowwww. I thought it was a Moses Lake thing for the teens.

Funny post!

just call me jo said...

I've had dryer sheets fall out of my pant leg but not beads. You are special. But then we already knew that!

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...

YOU my Dear, are an *Arteeeeeeeeeest*, with words! You are!

You can make a simple thing like a necklace breaking, into a day-long saga. And a funny one, too.

Oh my, I also love that "Spartin Farkles"! ,-) Your hubby is no slouch at this use-of-words, either.

Hugs and ♥'s...
'Cause Valentine Day is coming!

Vee said...

Hope that you write the book!

Debby@Just Breathe said...

I am sure that was a mess but thanks for the laugh!

Laurie said...

You crack me up Colleen, really you do need to write a book. I think it could be a best seller!

Neabear said...

This was too funny! But I loved it! I also have had dryer sheets fall out of my pants, and socks from the day before that were still stuck in there when I changed to pj's. And another experience I had....at work....one time when I was driving in to park...I saw a guy walking with his dad to visit his mom who was getting therapy at our rehab department. I noticed the dad(old guy) kicking one leg around, lo and behold out came POOP! Yes POOP! I could not believe it. So the son turned the dad around to return to the car and obviously to change clothes. I told other therapists about it and at first they did not believe me...had to take them out and show them the spot where the POOP was. We still laugh about that now and then!

~Linnea

Pen Pen said...

LOL... love it. also love the comment above about the old man pooping from his pants leg!